i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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