Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Intervention is following me on twitter.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND