oh god the rape fog is back!
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
