I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
