Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
