I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
