the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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