He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
