Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
21 Millennials Confess The Most Awkward Way Someone Has Tried Hitting On Them
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.