I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
