I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
