if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
they need to just BURY HIM!
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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