Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i would punch a child for taco bell
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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