Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Randomize
