I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
