i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
