Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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