I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
