i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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