"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
