i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
