Your mouth is God's brothel.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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