your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
