This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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