she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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