He kissed a someone with a penis
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Randomize
