I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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