Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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