i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize