Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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