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• (954): View more from Florida

  He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"

  (954): View more from Florida

  Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back

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• (425): View more from Washington

  He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.

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• (805): View more from California

  I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...

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• (530): View more from California

  When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.

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