and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.