last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
