Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Randomize
