Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
