the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
