Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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