I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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