I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
