that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
