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as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
accomplished twins. life is a go
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
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