38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
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she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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