You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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