I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
