Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
