i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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