This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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