Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
