There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
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