Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I just gargled with NyQuil
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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