i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
